Thursday, July 24, 2014
You are here: Home » Humour » Friday Funnies by Microdave
Friday Funnies by Microdave

Friday Funnies by Microdave

I’ve decided to have a food flavoured (sic) theme this week. But first, if we get any more Global Warming this winter, you might want to invest in a pair of these:

Scare The Neighbours Funnies

Now imagine the complaints there would be if a UK company operated trucks with this sort of sign-writing on the back:

Meat Truck

One truck driver who didn’t exactly have an “Eggscellent” day:

Eggs Funnies

Don’t laugh – it’s no yolk…

The suppliers of genuine beef are doing a roaring trade at the moment. I don’t know if Iced Tea goes well with meat, but at least this brand is naturally flavoured:

Natural Flavour

You’ll want some herbs to season the beef:

Herbs A to Z Funnies

How about a Tuna sandwich as well?

Tuna Sandwich

Then chew a piece of gum to remove all the “fishy” bits from your teeth…

Mentos Cum Funnies

Do make sure that food preparation areas are properly cleaned before use…

Shit In My Kitchen Funnies

And if your going for a “peace”? afterwards please be careful (and watch out for the pedants)…

Aim Too Please

Be sure to check your equipment:

Feel The Balls Funnies

Finally, wash your hands:

Wash Hands

Then this lady won’t mind you getting closer:

tadaa

Is this her daughter?

Whore Family Funnies

I bought a Valentine’s Day card for everyone at our local Tourette’s Society.

It’s the thought that cunts.

 

I had a dream last night … I was getting a blow job off the blonde one out of Abba.

It would have been great except for his beard being rough on my balls.

 

Medical researchers have just announced that they have discovered a new illness which has no symptoms. It is impossible to detect and has no known cure. Fortunately no cases have been reported yet.

I’m sure Bucko will have some music or films to keep you entertained after wading through this rubbish…

MD

VN:F [1.9.22_1171]
Rate this post :
Rating: 4.6/5 (14 votes cast)
Friday Funnies by Microdave, 4.6 out of 5 based on 14 ratings

9 comments

  1. Eggsellent selection this week Dave.

    Like the flashy lady most of all. WTF is that landing strip near her flange?

    I need a big triangle. Points the way, innit?

    Have a good weekend,

    CR.

    VA:F [1.9.22_1171]
    Rating: 0.0/5 (0 votes cast)
  2. Well that’s cheered-up this Friday. Thanks MD.

    The likes of the “Wash your hands after having a pee” instruction always make me smile.

    As that sign rightly states, your hands pick up germs from everything they’ve touched, including the door handle to enter the loo.

    The chances are, nowt’s touched the wriggle-worm since the morning shower. So to minimise the spread of germs, logic dictates one’s hands should be washed before extracting the dip-stick to pee.

    VA:F [1.9.22_1171]
    Rating: 5.0/5 (1 vote cast)
    • Faultless logic Mr Public. I soak my underpants in Lysol and therefore never have to wash my hands.

      VA:F [1.9.22_1171]
      Rating: 0.0/5 (0 votes cast)
  3. The ‘Herbs’ cracked me up. A supermarket employee with a sense of humour and can spell. A rare breed indeed. Also where can I get a pair of those awesome boots? Oh yes, I also liked the naked girl. Time for my medication.

    VA:F [1.9.22_1171]
    Rating: 0.0/5 (0 votes cast)
  4. These animals are just dying for you to taste them. LOL.

    VA:F [1.9.22_1171]
    Rating: 0.0/5 (0 votes cast)
  5. Must be horses.

    VA:F [1.9.22_1171]
    Rating: 0.0/5 (0 votes cast)
  6. Loved the Abba one!!

    VA:F [1.9.22_1171]
    Rating: 0.0/5 (0 votes cast)
  7. Cheers for the link. Someone followed it and discovered she lives in the same town as me. We’ve been chatting about local pubs and the smoking ban.

    The eggs picture broke my heart, I love eggs. I would have been there with a brush and shovel, planning the scrambled egg fest of a lifetime.

    VA:F [1.9.22_1171]
    Rating: 0.0/5 (0 votes cast)
  8. Wish our local hoodies looked like that .

    VA:F [1.9.22_1171]
    Rating: 0.0/5 (0 votes cast)
Scroll To Top

Hit Counter provided by brochure holders