The “Guess Who” in last week’s Friday Funnies led to a discussion of Germans wandering about the Baltic coast stark bollock naked, then UK Fred said:
“Isn’t that where the fish with a taste for tackle have emigrated to?”
Indeed they have:
I wonder if those fish like Ice Cream?
At the last supper, Jesus takes the bread, blesses it, and says,
“Take this, all of you, and eat it, for this is my body.”
He then proceeds to bless the wine and says,
“Take this, all of you, and drink it, for this is my blood.”
Finally, he picks up the milk, but Peter looks at him and says,
“You can fuck off right off.”
Another item from the press:
I wonder if their spell checker flagged up any alternatives?
One of the journalists found a rather strange mushroom on the verge nearby…
A nearby university has an ideal candidate for the drive in:
I wonder if there will be any competition from the other side of town?
If the patrons are worried about their secret escaping, they can always employ some covert measures:
Or they can use the “Tradesmens” entrance…
Of course if they really don’t give a fuck how’s this for a laugh?
You have to take your hat off to Cheryl Cole’s tattoo artist , 15 hours work without a cock up
An old pensioner is hobbling his way home through the red light district.
“Hey, Handsome, how about it?”
“You’re joking,” says the 90-year-old, “I just can’t manage it any more.”
“Ah, come on,” says the whore, “it’ll be really nice.”
After a bit of humming and hawing, the pensioner goes along and when they finally get onto the whore’s bed he rides her like a fucking god, giving her multiple real orgasms and wearing her out. She can’t believe it when he finally shoots his load and gives her a break.
“Wow, old man,” says the whore, exhausted, “that was such a great fuck. And you said you couldn’t manage it any more?”
“Oh I can still fuck, Honey,” says the old geezer, “it’s just that I can’t pay.”
And to finish off here’s the totty, c/o Soylent Siberia: